I didn’t want to admit, but I know so well that growth consists in change. Small changes, big changes, they all lead to growth if you think that way. Life is like that. Life is unpredictable and always changing. Us people, the only way of making things work is to adjust to change. But this is not always easy to do. It might be easier for some us, but for others, me included, adapting to change could be a lot more difficult. It takes a lot of effort and discipline to become more acceptant to change. So I started training myself.
Living with my parents in the countryside is living a life that has not so many challenges. It’s simpler than it would be if I lived alone. You split the responsibilities and life is sometimes simpler. Not necessarily easier, but simpler. I like that, but I started to feel afraid. What if I won’t be able to get out of my comfort zone? What if I fail to grow because I become complacent? There were so many what ifs that sometimes it felt like there were so many people inside my head each trying to make his opinion be heard.
It is said that the best way of getting accustomed to something is to expose yourself to that specific something. I didn’t want to admit because it was so scary. I remember when I first did this exposure thing consciously. It was when I was searching for my first job. I was still a student so I had not experience with jobs. I was offered to work in a call center, and even if I become anxious every time I have to make a phone call, I thought that maybe if I exposed myself to something I was afraid of, I would become accustomed and get over my anxiety. But it wasn’t like that. I resigned in less than 3 months because talking on the phone with clients was extremely stressful. The exposure strategy didn’t work. However my desire to grow is so big that I decided to become accustomed to change. In order to do that, I realized that I needed to create my own rules, and that I should start with small changes that will make my brain believe that change is good.
First you need to convince yourself that change is good and that you don’t have to by afraid of change. So wisely choose your first challenges. As I am the type of person who does important things with small, but consistent steps, I decided to start with small challenges/changes. This is how I came up with a new project for my self-development: one new challenge per week. At first I tried to do it daily, but I started to get super tired and stressed because of it in less than 2 weeks and this was not my intention. So I reduced it at one challenge per week. But I admit that this is not always successful. I don’t consider it a failure, but an adaptation to each week’s circumstances. I don’t want another to do thing on my list, but rather the opportunity to enjoy the process of growing. Thus I might have weeks where I don’t really have any idea of what I should challenge myself with. These are rare, but I am aware that I am still not comfortable with change. It is ok, I try not to stress myself by overthinking it. All the good things and projects I did until now were formed in time and finalized in many steps and with continuous efforts. You might not realize, but small steps can still lead you to your dreams. So keep doing what you think it is important to you, keep doing what makes you happy, keep doing what makes you learn and grow.
The challenge I had for last week and that I decided to extend for this week as well is no spending week challenge. My intention was for me to stop spending money on whatever might be for a week, and then I decided to extend it until my pay day. It was not very easy, even when living in the countryside. Now, having what you need or want at your door is simpler and faster than ever before. In my efforts of becoming a minimalist, I try to become aware that wanting something and needing it are two different things. And because happiness doesn’t come with possessing things, I try to buy the things that I need more than the things that I want. I also question whether my needs are really needs or maybe subconscious ideas of wanting something. I do this in order to keep a balance and to use my money wisely, and I don’t feel this process of analysis as burdening or stressful. Deciding to have a break from spending was great. I pat my head and I enjoy the result. I feel I got to know one more thing about me. I could take a break from this system because I wanted. I realized that spending money can become a new addiction. I realized that there were things that I didn’t really want and I didn’t even need them, so this 2 weeks period was also some sort of purification. I didn’t mention another very important aspect, but I think you might have guessed. This challenge is perfect for my finances.
This is it for today. Thank you for joining me and for reading my story and I hope to see you around next time as well.
Stay safe and no matter the small steps you take, keep walking.